March Movie Rankings


Five years ago, Juicy Reviews began. Of course, it started on Facebook, but March was the first month of movie rankings to ever take precedence. Way back then, “Oz the Great and Powerful” took home the gold for March. Now we must see who takes it five years later, amongst a respectable ten candidates (not too shabby of a month).

#9- “Call Me By Your Name”
15%= Burnt Popcorn
Pros: Good cinematography and location.
Cons: Terrible plot that only displays itself as a means of showing two guys have sex. It’s essentially “Fifty Shades,” but with men. The characters are hollow, the acting is flat, and the story is just about pointless.

#8- “Let There Be Light” (2017)
43%= Burnt Popcorn
Pros: Has a nice message behind it (albeit a predictable and heavily done one) and some of the performances aren’t that bad.
Cons: Often hilariously bad in its writing, most of the acting is amateur, and the ending doesn’t give much closure or a conclusion to the conflict they set up.

#7- “The Florida Project”
73%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Interesting story for the most part, great performances (especially the child actors), and great cinematography.
Cons: There isn’t much redemption to this tale, nor a satisfying conclusion. The plot wasn’t all too cohesive and swayed from interesting to boring.

#6- “Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle”
77%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Fun, funny, entertaining for the most part, and has a solid cast with good chemistry.
Cons: Attempts at character development often fell flat, due to them taking themselves too seriously. Also, the plot is pretty predictable as the story follows many of the tropes of action/adventure flicks.

#5- “The Post”
84%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Fantastic acting, great cinematography, good setting, and fun for what it was.
Cons: Certainly Spielberg’s flattest piece, there are many plot devices that are familiar from other features, and the story doesn’t do all too much to propel to it awesomeness.

#5- “Lady Bird”
84%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Great acting, good chemistry between mom and daughter, had a strong first act, and the story was interesting.
Cons: The further the film went on, the more the quality dropped. This is due to a focus on teenage tropes and drama that prove unappealing to me as an audience member.

#4- “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri”
85%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Fresh writing, bizarre style of dialogue, brilliant performances, good direction, and a different plot.
Cons: The story isn’t moralistic whatsoever, and hardly holds any redemption outside of one character, leaving me a bit bereft exiting the theater.

#3- “The Shape of Water”
86%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Good acting, a fantastic performance by Michael Shannon, wonderful cinematography and atmosphere, and has a gripping third act.
Cons: Fish sex, there are too many story arcs that try to take center stage (some of which are unnecessary, like the old man and diner boy), and the story is pretty predictable.

#2- “Phantom Thread”
88%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Beautiful cinematography and wardrobe, fantastic setting, outstanding performances, and a highly engaging plot for a dialogue-heavy feature.
Cons: The ending was disappointing and too odd of a route for the filmmakers to take, especially considering the tone this movie was going for in its entirety.

#1- “Darkest Hour” (2017)
91%= Juicy Popcorn
Pros: Straightforward story, yet elegant. The acting was superb, the story was solid, the dialogue was engaging, and the cinematography mixed with the setting and musical score made for a fun night.
Cons: It would’ve been nice for the plot to venture out into territory that wasn’t so predictable or rooted in the message it was obviously trying to push.


“Darkest Hour” moves on to fight “Glengarry Glen Ross,” “Blade Runner 2049,” and the rest of the monthly winners to decide what film deserves the coveted Movie of the Year.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s